When Life Serves you Lemons…

Hard times, transitions, losses, Murphey poking his head up, these are a part of life. A friend of mine once said, “The only constant in life is change… losses, hard times and murphy’s law. So when this happens is the glass of water half empty or half full? Reality is it’s only a half a glass of water. But our perception can mold our outlook and mood. I heard a wise woman once said to never get to sad or too happy. Keep calm and maintain a steady demeanor. An optimist may scoff at this while a negative nelly may lament on how bad things always happen to them. But again the reality is bad things happen to good, bad and normal every day Joes. Another words bad times afflict everyone at some time in their life. Yes certain life situations will make some more vulnerable or less vulnerable.

“Always look on the bright side of life”

Finding the rainbow in the clouds is certainly fun and helps elevated the pain when you experience difficult situations. We had a recent election. Half of the American population is ecstatic while the other side is in tears and scared of the future. But it is finished and the future will bear sweet apples or lemons. No one knows for sure. It okay to be sad or to be joyous. But like a party, don’t be the last guest to leave (unless you’re helping to clean up). A chronic optimist can be judgmental and just plain annoying. It also can set you up for a let big letdown. However, someone who walks around like pig pen except with a cloud of doom versus dust is not much better. (more…)

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Overcoming the Feeling of Hopelessness

Many of us have lived lives that for the most part where OK. Maybe we had times that were stressful, or a loved one passed away. Maybe finances became tight or a job was lost. But with perseverance and support from friends and family we never came to a point that life lost all meaning, and all feelings of hope. Then again there are those of us who have experienced the indescribable feeling of hopelessness. The sense that no matter what we do or who we turn to, it is fruitless because it seems that there is no one or no answer to resolve our dilemma. In medical terms we would be suffering from Major Depressive Disorder, sometimes called clinical depression. But it goes deeper than that.

Michael Moore in his book “Care of the Soul” talks about depression in a way that uses it as an ally or tool that can lead us to solutions to the imbalances that situations in life can bring us to. I have found this helpful when I have felt sad. In fact, I have found that by using the concept of my depression helping me to heal has brought me answers that have helped to resolve whatever was bothering me. From this I gained hope. By knowing this I am able to be hopeful in many situations. (more…)

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How to Pick the Right Therapist

A therapist-client relationship is similar in many ways to other professional relationships. It involves the components of confidentiality, establishing trust and confidence, has ethical and professional boundaries, and requires the therapist to have the expertise and experience needed to help you with your particular issue. It is also a very personal relationship that requires an intrinsic understanding of your personhood. By this I mean the therapist must accept you for who you are, what is troubling you, and where you are in your life journey.
There are several ways to connect with a therapist. You may be referred by another professional such as your doctor, or your insurance company. You may ask a close friend or colleague to recommend a therapist. Or you may look one up on the internet or phone book.

How do you know if a particular therapist is right for you? You could do the trial and error method, but that is time consuming and frustrating. However, there are steps you can take to increase your potential of connecting with the right professional. (more…)

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