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By Eric Baker, Jul 7, 2017- The Ladders
You don’t remember me, but I was in your experiment a year ago. I just wanted to thank you. It changed my life.”
James Pennebaker has had a number of people say this to him over the years.
In the early 80’s he came across a study showing that people who experienced personal traumas but didn’t discuss them were more likely to get sick.
He wondered if just writing about their emotional upheavals could help people recover. And the research he did changed lives.
In the 30 years since, hundreds of studies have documented the effectiveness of expressive writing.
It helped with anxiety, tragedy, heartache . . . It even gave relief to those coping with cancer, heart disease, chronic pain, and AIDS.
People who write about their problems gain a host of benefits including feeling happier, sleeping better, and even getting better grades.
By Travis Bradberry
“People inspire you, or they drain you — pick them wisely.” – Hans F. Hansen
Recent research from Friedrich Schiller University in Germany shows just how serious toxic people are. They found that exposure to stimuli that cause strong negative emotions — the same kind of exposure you get when dealing with toxic people — caused subjects’ brains to have a massive stress response.
Whether it’s negativity, cruelty, the victim syndrome, or just plain craziness, toxic people drive your brain into a stressed-out state that should be avoided at all costs.
Studies have long shown that stress can have a lasting, negative impact on the brain. Exposure to even a few days of stress compromises the effectiveness of neurons in the hippocampus, an important brain area responsible for reasoning and memory. Weeks of stress cause reversible damage to brain cells, and months of stress can permanently destroy them. Toxic people don’t just make you miserable — they’re really hard on your brain.
The ability to manage your emotions and remain calm under pressure has a direct link to your performance. TalentSmart has conducted research with more than a million people, and we’ve found that 90% of top performers are skilled at managing their emotions in times of stress in order to remain calm and in control. One of their greatest gifts is the ability to identify toxic people and keep them at bay.
It’s often said that you’re the product of the five people you spend the most time with. If you allow even one of those five people to be toxic, you’ll soon find out how capable he or she is of holding you back.
“I wish people understood that I don’t have a choice in how my brain works.”
Posted on Jan. 13, 2017, at 10:31 a.m.
Caroline Kee
Caroline Kee
BuzzFeed News Reporter (https://www.buzzfeed.com/carolinekee/adhd-is-a-disorder-not-a-choice?utm_term=.dm7wmO2Jjv#.mqnP2LzK6l )
We recently asked members of the BuzzFeed Community living with ADD/ADHD to tell us what they wish other people understood about the disorder. Here are some of the best responses.
(Quick note: ADD/ADHD is a neurological disorder characterized by difficulty sustaining attention, by lack of self-control, and by impaired working memory. It’s now more often classified in medical literature as attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), but lots of people (including some doctors) still refer to it as ADD. For the purpose of clarity and conciseness, we will refer to the disorder as ADHD for the remainder of this article.) (more…)
When in the midst of a storm it is hard to feel grateful. As we travel the path life has laid out for us we will run through days of blue skies, cloudy ones, and downpours. Staying focused versus being swayed by each day’s good or chaos is difficult. And to be grateful during times of trouble can seem impossible. But the fact is, if you can find gratitude even in the most terrible of times, you will find solace to comfort you.
So why do I believe this is true? I have faced my share of death, chaos, financial loss, illness and more. Sometimes I created my own woes and other times they came to me from others or events that I had no control of. Until I could grasp the concept of acceptance and gratitude I would unnecessarily struggle with my own thoughts or be influenced by the negativity of others. But when I learned to take time to accept my predicament and be grateful for what I did have is when I began to master my inner turmoil. (more…)